FreeTruth

Questioning Questions

There is no one way to do fellowship. The Bible presents many approaches to personal care for each other’s souls. One very effective method relies heavily on the use of questions. Now you may find yourself questioning the use of questions: “Is there a biblical precedent for this? How is this helpful? Will this feel oppressive and intrusive for the one being questioned?”

“Where Are You” Adam?
In the first ever personal ministry and counseling time (Genesis 3:9-13), we find God searching for Adam following Adam’s act of disobedience. As God approaches this hiding sinner (which describes all of us to some extent), He approaches him with questions, questions the answers for which God already knew.

God asks Adam a series of questions in order to give Adam an opportunity to come out of hiding and to see issues of his heart in ways more helpful than if God had simply come to Adam with a series of corrections or pieces of advice.

The use of questions to help people see the needs and issues of their hearts is a common biblical approach to personal care and correction.* It is not the only valid approach but it is an extremely effective one. One of its advantages (in contrast to a more informational and advice-giving approach) is that it allows people to hear their own thoughts and attitudes without having to be told them by others. In this way, under the blessing of the Holy Spirit, the process of conviction goes on more personally and directly.**

If you obtain my full booklet on this topic (Live Together or Die Alone: a Call to Radical Fellowship), you will see an example from my own life of when I was led into seeing my own heart through a brother’s effective use of questions. In that situation, I do not think I would have seen my heart as clearly if I had been approached by someone loaded with observations and words of wisdom or correction to bring to my attention. The use of gentle questions was effective in opening my heart to see my own issues without proud defensiveness or argument.

Here is a list of questions that can be useful for our conversations/fellowship together:
1. What evidences of grace are you experiencing these days (i.e.-clear signs of growth in Christ and joy in the gospel)?
2. What is one specific truth you gained from that sermon or study or book?
3. What is one specific application of it that you plan to make in your life?
4. What are you struggling with these days?
5. What are biblical terms for this struggle?
6. Why do you think you are struggling with it?
7. How might your view of God affect this struggle?
8. How does the gospel affect you in this battle?


* For a sampling of other examples see God’s questioning of Cain in Genesis 4:6, 9, 10 and of Job in Job 38-41; Samuel’s probing of Saul in 1 Samuel 15:14; Jesus’ use of questions in John 6:5, 6; Luke 24:17, 19; apostolic deployment of questions in James 4:1f; 1 Corinthians 4:7.

** Another fruit of the practiced use of specific questions is an ability to self-assess and self-counsel. Individuals can ask themselves questions which aid in their awareness of the issues and state of their own hearts, so that even when others are not present, the work of sanctification can proceed at full speed.

Labels: christian life, Church, Fellowship, Spiritual disciplines

Hebrews: A Model of Gospel Centered Correction

As stated earlier, the book of Hebrews is both a call to warning and exhorting fellowship, and an example of it. It calls us to warn each other and it is itself an extended warning. So it models what it commands.

If space allowed we could unpack various aspects of such ministry that the author utilizes in this letter.* We would see that he uses a variety of tools in his exhortation appeal to his readers: fear, hope, the love of God our Father, promises, historical examples of what happens to people who do not persevere in faith, and then examples of what God does for those who do.

More than anything, the author proclaims the surpassing worth of Christ (Hebrews 1-4) and the surpassing work of Christ (Hebrews 5-10) as the chief means to inspire his readers to keep on keeping on in the faith of Christ. This is another reminder that all ministry—even warning and exhortation ministry—must always remain gospel ministry. All one anothering in the body of Christ must always be thoroughly Christ and cross centered, or it will not be effective ministry at all.

This is truth for life. I’m reminded of 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 where the ongoing process of being saved (i.e.-the process of perseverance in faith) is maintained through a never ending commitment to the gospel of a crucified and risen Savior. Hebrews models this wonderfully.

All ministry, all fellowship, all correction and wounding grace must be lived out in an atmosphere saturated with an everyday focus on the Person and Work of Christ. Never correct anyone without giving them Christ. Never receive correction without receiving Christ in a fresh way along with that correction.

Correction, the harder work of fellowship, will do only harm unless it is accompanied by reminders of the free justifying, adopting, preserving, and forgiving promises of the gospel—all guaranteed for us through the redeeming work of the Savior.

The writer of Hebrews knew that; so should we.



* For a more complete understanding of the Hebrews’ call to radical fellowship you may obtain a spring, 2008 series of messages presented by TFC, entitled, Live Together or Die Alone. Visit our website to order or download this series.

** For more on cross centered living see our Cardiphonia entitled, Gospel Centered Living from A-Z as well as C.J. Mahaney’s Living the Cross Centered Life and Jerry Bridges’ The Gospel for Real Life.

Labels: christian life, Church, Fellowship, Spiritual disciplines

There is much about fellowship, that could be said, but I can’t draw this series out for too long so I’m going to have to zero in here on a few matters that I think need focus because they are areas of weakness in contemporary fellowship.

Where We Are Not So Strong

As we encounter the one another commands of Scripture we are not given the luxury of selective obedience; we have to pursue faithfulness in all that fellowship involves. With this in view we realize that there are aspects of fellowship in which most Christians are not so strong. Particularly I would identify the aspects of biblical correction, warning and admonition. We’ve yet to fully embrace the Bible’s teaching that we are to seek out and offer a ministry of mutual accountability and warning care, such as is encouraged in Proverbs 27:5, 6, 17:

Better is open rebuke than hidden love.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.
Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.

Proverbs isn’t calling us to a ministry of criticism or to a witch-hunt in the church. Rather God is challenging us to notice when brothers and sisters in Christ are caught up in patterns and habits of sin, and to do what we need to, to lead them into the forgiving and transforming grace of God.

Fellowship’s Harder Work

This is what I would call fellowship’s harder work. I say it’s harder, because, well, other things are easier. If anyone finds this work easy, I’d suggest a heart transplant. Frankly, anyone who enjoys wounding a friend is disturbed. People who love find no immediate pleasure in speaking correction or rebuke into the lives of those they love. Parents will know well the experience of disciplining their kids, and being compelled to say to them in the process; “This hurts me at least as much as it hurts you.” Why? Because it does.

Hebrews: A Mandate for Wounding Fellowship

The New Testament letter called Hebrews serves at least two functions. It is both a wounding and warning letter, and it is also a call to wounding and warning fellowship. In this letter the Holy Spirit warns us to stop sinning against, and wandering from Christ,* and He also commands us to warn one another, lest any of us should so wander. Here are three key texts commanding the latter:

“Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called ‘today’, that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin…”

“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

“Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed. Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled; that no one is sexually immoral or unholy like Esau, who sold his birthright for a single meal” (Hebrews 3:12, 13; 10:24, 25; 12:12-16).

Hebrews makes it clear that we are our brothers’ (and sisters’) keeper. What matters to you should matter to me, and nothing matters more than that you (and I) keep on keeping on in the way of Christ.

Next time we'll look at what's at stake in all this.


* See Hebrews 2:1-3; 3:12; 4:5-13; 10:26-39; 12:18-29; 13:22. In Hebrews 13:22, the author calls his whole letter an exhortation/warning: “I appeal to you, brothers, bear with my word of exhortation, for I have written to you briefly.”

Labels: christian life, Church, Fellowship, Spiritual disciplines

One Anothering

Biblical fellowship is fleshed out through a series of New Testament one anothering commands.* Numbering over 50, these commands define the breadth, depth and scope of fellowship as revealed by God. Through these one anothers we see that biblical fellowship cannot be reduced to one-dimensional conversationalism, but must be pursued as a multi-faceted and multi-layered enterprise of love. In order for a church to care faithfully and fully for its members, it needs to embrace all these dimensions of fellowship and practice them with intentional focus.

Selective Fellowship

My experience has been—as I witness my own inclinations and those of others I love—that we tend to be selective in our practice of fellowship. We define and do fellowship in commitment terms with which we are most at ease. We choose aspects of fellowship that fit our personality most readily, make our friends most comfortable, or avoid the tasks most unpleasant.

But the thing about one anothering commands is that they are one anothering commands. All of them are imperatives which mean that none of them is optional. So practicing the one anothers is not a matter of personality or spiritual gifting; it’s a matter of obedience. All of us must do all these things in whatever sphere of fellowship and responsibility God entrusts to us. God calls us to step into this work with faith that He will enable us as we go.

God Gives What God Commands

Sometimes we avoid certain duties because we fear we cannot do them. When obedience is neither comfortable nor easy nor natural, we are tempted not even to try. It was this battle with moral paralysis that led the early church father, Augustine to pray: “Lord, give what you command, and command what you will.”

Augustine prays for grace from God so that he might be obedient to God. He asks God to give what He commands. Then in the confidence that God will do just that, this early Christian pastor boldly invites God to command whatever He wills. And he does so backed up with biblical promise:

“Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen” (1 Peter 4:8-11, emphasis added).**

It is this confidence that God gives grace whenever God gives duty that can liberate us to enter the world of true fellowship with believing hope.


* For example: Romans 13:8; 12:5, 10, 16; 15:5-7, 14; 16:16; Galatians 5:13; 6:1, 2; 1 Thessalonians 3:12; 4:9; 5:11, 26; 1 Peter 1:22; 5:14; 1 John 3:11; John 13:34, 35; Acts 2:46; 4:32; Ephesians 4:2; 5:21; Philippians 1:27; Hebrews 3:12, 13; 10:24,
25; 1 Corinthians 16:20; 2 Corinthians 13:12; Colossians 3:12, 13.

** See also Philippians 2:12, 13; 1 Corinthians 12:4-11, especially v.11

Labels: Church, Fellowship, Spiritual disciplines

I’ll be away on vacation for a few days, but in my absence I’ve prepared a few posts that are excerpted from my booklet: Live Together or Die Alone: A Call to Radical Fellowship. I hope you are stimulated to love and good works by them.

Introduction

The Greek words for fellowship appear twenty-seven times in the New Testament, and speak of something shared or held in common or partnered in. Fellowship, a shared life of faith and love, is an essential dynamic of the Christian life. It is essential in that it is part of the essence of life in Christ: we cannot be in Christ without sharing the life of His body (1 Corinthians 12:12, 13).* And it is essential in that none of us can get along without it.** Literally it is true: we live together or we die alone.

Going Beyond “How Are You?”

It’s been observed often that we Christians know well how to dilute the idea of fellowship. We reduce it to little more than chit-chat, being masters of the superficial, engaging in the equivalent of a social dance with a stranger, synchronizing our conversational steps so as to move slightly in each other’s direction without stepping on each other’s toes or getting too close.

We ask each other “How are you?” but then don’t wait around for anything resembling a real answer. If anyone answers with anything but a smiling-faced “I’m fine!” we don’t know how to respond and we’re quite sure we don’t want to. We know that we’re supposed to go beyond how are you, but we seldom seem to get there.

I wish these last two paragraphs exaggerated churches’ fellowship deficiencies, but as I re-read them, I’m startled by how precisely they describe much of my own flawed interaction with others. I’m guilty of the sin of shallow fellowship.

May I encourage you to feel bold enough in God’s forgiving grace in Christ to look hard at yourself to see if you have been guilty of fellowship neglect as well? Let’s realize that grace covers even our failures to love one another in the church as we ought, and with that knowledge let’s stare sin in the face so we can see where we need to grow.


* “All believers share a common life in Christ, whether or not we recognize it. We are in fellowship with literally thousands of believers from every nation of the world. Although we have never met most of them, yet we are in fellowship with them. We disagree with many of them over various issues of faith and practice, yet we are still members of the same Body. Even though we struggle to like some of them, that does not alter the fact that we share together a common life in Christ. Neither our attitudes nor our actions affect this objective sense of koinonia (fellowship). We are in fellowship with all other believers, whether we like it or not--or even recognize the fact. This objective truth of koinonia is meant to provide the foundation for the experiential aspects of fellowship. The realization that we do in fact share a common life with other believers should stimulate within us a desire to share experientially with one another. This is the whole thrust of New Testament teaching on koinonia" (Jerry Bridges).

** "We should not...think of our fellowship with other Christians as a spiritual luxury, an optional addition to the exercises of private devotion. We should recognize rather that such fellowship is a spiritual necessity; for God has made us in such a way that our fellowship with himself is fed by our fellowship with fellow-Christians, and requires to be so fed constantly for its own deepening and enrichment” (J.I. Packer).

Labels: christian life, Church, Fellowship, Spiritual disciplines

did you catch my spelling error in the recent blog. i put an e instead of an a in the middle of exhilaration. i've got a really good friend who pointed that out to me yesterday-with a big smile of authentic love. and you know what i did? i smiled back with a pretty good sized smile of authentic gratitude.

now that may not seem like much to you, but if you know me very well, you're probably aware that my return smile is a fairly new deal for me when it comes to having people point out my mistakes. i've been marked all too often and far too long by a pretty strong streak of defensiveness.

by the way, defensiveness is a euphemism for pride, self-sufficiency, arrogance, and self-righteousness. defensivness says in essence: "i'm above your correction" (pride); "i don't need your correction; if i have problems i can handle them on my own" (self-sufficiency); "i am really the one who should be correcting you, because i'm right and you're wrong" (arrogance); "i am so good and so near perfection that i have no real issues to be corrected" (self-righteousness). such sins all too often marked my heart in the face of correction.

so when my friend corrected my spelling yesterday and i felt hardly a ripple of such arrogance in response, i was glad in the transforming mercy of God. God has changed me! don't get me wrong: i have to battle against my flesh on this issue every day. but the fact is that a humble response to correction has become a more common feature of my life-and it makes me weep over the kindness of God toward me.

here are a couple things that have helped me gain some victory:
1. i know where i stand in Christ. Romans 8:33-39 make it real clear that no one can accuse me or correct me or find fault with me in any way that can change my place in the justfying love of God in Christ. i'm untouchable, invincible and secure in the righteousness of Jesus.
2. i have learned that no one bring any sin or mistake to my attention that God does not know about already. God's love for me in Jesus is so full, so complete, so perfect and so bold, that it was able to see all that i am in all my sin and flaws, and choose to love me still. my friends and family may be surprised by my sins or mistakes, but God isn't. His eyes have always been wide open to them-and yet He has made me (and all who are in Christ the delight of His love).
3. i have learned that God uses correction as a primary means of grace (instrument of change into holiness) in my life. the Proverbs are filled with commendations of those who are open to correction, with promises of rich blessing and change attached. so correction is really a gift to be loved, not a foe to be resisted.

so thanks my friend for correcting my spelling. you not only taught me something, you reminded me of how God's grace has been changing me. and everyone else: please feel free to correct anything else that you think needs attention. i need it, and because i'm in Jesus, i can handle it (at least better than i used to!).

you may want to check our C.J. Mahaney's book, Humility, if you want more help in the receiving of correction grace from others. it's sure helped me. go to www.sovereigngraceministries.org and their bookstore.

P.S.-by the way, if you find any more speling erors, blaim it on my cumputer or fateeg or sumthing else. i'm sure it wazn't me.

Labels: Fellowship